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1、南京市第二次模拟考试英语书面表达讲评,江苏省石庄高级中学 秦建华,请仔细观察以下六幅图,用英语描述其内容,并就图中教师的做法提出你的看法,注意:1.第一幅图的内容已给出. 2.字数120左右 3.签名signature Ma Xiaohu was very careless and often made mistakes in his homework, which made his teacher very angry. One day his teacher had Xiaohu ask his father, Ma Dahua, to sign his name in his exerc
2、ise book.,第一步：看图提炼要点,第二幅图：儿子在回家路上的想法：怕被父亲惩罚/打,第三幅图：儿子蒙上眼睛写字,第四幅图：父亲也蒙上眼睛写字,第五幅图：儿子乘机让父亲签名,第六幅图：在父亲取下蒙眼布前，儿子将本子放进书包,第二步：简单翻译要点,第二幅图：儿子在回家路上的想法：怕被父亲惩罚/打 On his way home, Xiaohu thought he would be beaten/punished again by his father. 第三幅图：儿子蒙上眼睛写字 Xiaohu covered his eyes with a piece of cloth and kept
3、 writing something.,第四幅图：父亲也蒙上眼睛写字 His father also covered his eyes with a piece of cloth and wrote something. 第五幅图：儿子乘机让父亲签名 Xiaohu seized the opportunity to put his exercise book under his fathers pen and got his fathers signature. 第六幅图：在父亲取下蒙眼布前，儿子将本子放进书包 Before his father took off the cloth,Xiao
4、hu had already put the exercise book back into his schoolbag.,第三步：增加要点，使文章逻辑上连贯,要多问几个什么、为什么、怎么样或怎么办 怕被父亲惩罚/打，心情怎么样： 比如焦虑、担心、紧张等 怎么办： 想出好主意,儿子蒙上眼睛不停地写什么字： 结合图画内容可以推断是在写自己的名字（为下文得到父亲的签名做铺垫） 父亲为什么也蒙上眼睛写他的名字： 按常理应该是儿子请他这样做的,第四步：柔进这些要点，并注意合并要点,On his way home, thinking he would be beaten again by his fat
5、her,Xiaohu felt worried.Suddenly a good idea occurred to him. As soon as he got home,he covered his eyes with a piece of cloth and kept writing the word”Ma Xiaohu” on a piece of paper. He asked his father whether he could do it as he was doing.His father did so.Seeing this,Xiaohu seized the opportun
6、ity to put his exercise book under his fathers pen and got his fathers signature.Before his father took off the cloth,Xiaohu had already put the exercise book back into his schoolbag.,第五步：简单阐述自己的看法,通过正反分析、因果分析、一分为二地分析并提出建议等形式来陈诉自己的观点或看法。 正面分析：Personally I firmly believe/insist that the teachers meth
7、od is after all for Xiaohus own sake.,反面分析：,It appears to me/occurs to me that/There is no denying that the teachers method is entirely wrong/the teacher is to blame for it/the teacher should improve his teaching method. It is /unnecessary for/not unwise/ advisable of the teacher to take this measur
8、e/follow this way.,因果分析：,For one thing,it is of no use to force students to study;for another,some students in this case will tell lies to/take in parents,which has a bad influence on childrens development/would lead to bad results.,一分为二分析并提出建议,I dont think the teacher is to blame because he had wan
9、ted to let Xiaohus father know something about his sons study at school in order to get Xiaohus parents support in educating their child,but Xiaohus playing the trick was not what the teacher had expected.So I suggest that the teacher go home together with Xiaohu next time to communicate face-to-fac
10、e with his parents.,形成以下书面表达,Ma Xiaohu was very careless and often made mistakes in his homework, which made his teacher very angry. One day his teacher had Xiaohu ask his father, Ma Dahua, to sign his name in his exercise book.On his way home, thinking he would be beaten again by his father,Xiaohu
11、felt worried.Suddenly a good idea occurred to him. As soon as he got home,he covered his eyes with a piece of cloth and kept writing the word”Ma Xiaohu” on a piece of paper. He asked his father whether he could do it as he was doing.His father did so.Seeing this, Xiaohu seized the opportunity to put
12、 his exercise book under his fathers pen and got his fathers signature.Before his father took off the cloth,Xiaohu had already put the exercise book back into his schoolbag. I dont think the teacher is to blame because he had wanted to let Xiaohus father know something about his sons study at school
13、 in order to get Xiaohus parents support in educating their child,but Xiaohus playing the trick was not what the teacher had expected.So I suggest that the teacher go home together with Xiaohu next time to communicate face-to-face with his parents.,参考答案,Ma Xiaohu was very careless and often made mis
14、takes in his homework, which made his teacher very angry. One day his teacher had Xiaohu ask his father, Ma Dahua, to sign his name in his exercise book. On his way home,thinking he would be beaten/punished again by his father,Xiaohu felt very worried.Suddenly a good idea occurred to him.As soon as
15、he got home,he covered his eyes with a piece of cloth and kept writing the word”Ma Xiaohu” on a piece of paper.He asked his father whether he could do it as he was doing.His father did so.seeing this,Xiaohu hurriedly put his exercise book under his fathers pen and got his signature.When his father t
16、ook off the cloth,Xiaohu had already put the exercise book back into his schoolbag. I think,附学生考场习作一篇（原文）,Ma Xiaohu was very careless and often made mistakes in his homework, which made his teacher very angry. One day his teacher had Xiaohu ask his father, Ma Dahua, to sign his name in his exercise
17、book. Xiaohu was afraid that his father would punish him.Suddenly,an idea occurred to him.When he went home,he pretended to practice writing his name with his eyes covered by a piece of cloth.Then,he asked his father to do so.When his father had his eyes covered, Xiaohu took his exercise book out qu
18、ickly and put it in front of his father.By doing so,he got his fathers signature easily without telling his father what had happened.Before his father could see again, he had already put his exercise book back in his schoolbag. As far as I am concerned, the teachers behaviour didnt work at all.He sh
19、ould have educated Ma Xiaohu in another way which helps Xiaohu to overcome his shortcomings.,修改后,Ma Xiaohu was very careless and often made mistakes in his homework, which made his teacher very angry. One day his teacher had Xiaohu ask his father, Ma Dahua, to sign his name in his exercise book. On
20、his way home ,thinking that his father would punish him again,Xiaohu felt nervous. Suddenly,a good idea occurred to him.When he got home,he kept writing his name with his eyes covered with a piece of cloth.Then,he asked his father to do so.When his father had his eyes covered, Xiaohu took his exerci
21、se book out quickly and put it in front of his father.By doing so,he got his fathers signature easily without telling his father what had happened.Before his father could see again, he had already put his exercise book back into his schoolbag. As far as I am concerned, the measures the teacher had taken didnt work at all.He should have educated Ma Xiaohu in another way which helps Xiaohu to overcome his shortcomings.,