商务英语写作 chapter 8.ppt

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1、,主 编:胡英坤 车丽娟,外语教学与研究出版社,Chapter 8,Persuasive Claims and Refusals,说服性索赔与拒绝函,Chapter,Contents of this chapter,I. Introduction,8,Persuasive Claims and Refusals,II. Sample Analysis,III. Sample Contrast,IV. Useful Patterns and Sentences,Chapter,I. Introduction,1. Persuasive claims,8,Persuasive Claims and

2、 Refusals,2. Refusals,Chapter,8,1. Persuasive claims,Persuasive claims do not begin by asking for an adjustment directly because they aim to influence the reader who is inclined to refuse the request and depend heavily on strategic planning. By persuasion, we mean reasoning with the readerpresenting

3、 facts logically that support your case.,Persuasive Claims and Refusals,Persuasive Claims,Instructions Provide a smooth transition from the opening sentence. Then follow the necessary background information for the claim. Tell exactly what the problem is in a neutral and courteous tone. Ask specific

4、ally and confidently for a specific request.,Chapter,8,Begin the claim letter with a compliment, and follow it with a statement of the problem or a brief review of actions you have taken to resolve the problem. Present facts to prove your claim is valid and explain why the company is responsible for

5、 the problem. Close by telling the reader exactly how you want the problem to be solved. Make the request clear.,Follow the following steps in writing:,1. Persuasive claims,Persuasive Claims and Refusals,on page 112 A persuasive claim on poor service of a hotel,Sample,Exercise,Group Discussion,Ex I

6、on p121,Point out the problems Problems: Begin directly, revealing the writers anger and dissatisfaction Fail to describe who, when and where this unhappy incident happened Didnt mention the solution,Improved version,Dear Mr. Green: I have been a customer of your department store for the last 10 yea

7、rs and have always been very happy with the service. However, when I visited the Ladies Department around noon Sunday, April 18, one of your assistants, Sandy Williams, was very unprofessional. When I asked for help she continued talking to her colleague. Eventually she said abruptly, “youll have to

8、 be quick. Im due for my break soon!”,This is not the sort of service that I have come to expect from the staff of your department store, and I hope you will investigate this matter. I look forward to your prompt reply. Yours sincerely, Linda,Chapter,8,2. Refusals,Refusal of a request is definitely

9、bad news. Therefore, things should not be said directly. In a refusal letter, you have two goals: one is to say no, and the other is to maintain a good relationship with the customer.,Persuasive Claims and Refusals,Chapter,8,Begin with words that indicate to which problem you are making a response.

10、You should use some buffers before the bad news. Explain why you refuse the request politely. Try to explain things from the customers point of view. Refuse politely. End with words expressing the willingness for future business cooperation.,Follow the following steps in writing:,2. Refusals,Persuas

11、ive Claims and Refusals,Useful patterns on p118-120,Beginning Refusal Indirect refusal Ending,samples from page 111,Chapter,8,Agreement: Find a point which you and the reader share similar views. Example: We both know how hard it is to make a profit in this industry. Appreciation: Express sincere th

12、anks for receiving something. Example: Your check for $127.17 arrived yesterday. Thank you.,IV. Useful Patterns and Sentences,Beginning: buffers,Persuasive Claims and Refusals,Chapter,8,Cooperation: Convey your willingness to help in any way you realistically can. Example: Employee service is here t

13、o smooth the way for those who work to achieve the companys goals.,IV. Useful Patterns and Sentences,Beginning: buffers,Persuasive Claims and Refusals,Chapter,8,Fairness: Assure the reader that youve closely examined and carefully considered the problem, or mention an appropriate action that has alr

14、eady been taken. Example: For the past week, we have carefully monitored those using the photocopying machine to see whether we can detect any pattern of use that might explain its frequent breakdowns.,IV. Useful Patterns and Sentences,Beginning: buffers,Persuasive Claims and Refusals,Chapter,8,Good

15、 news: Start with favorable message. Example: A replacement knob for your range is on its way, shipped on February 10 via UPS. Praise: Find an attribute or an achievement to compliment. Example: Your rsum shows an admirable breadth of experience, which should serve you as well as your progress in yo

16、ur career.,IV. Useful Patterns and Sentences,Beginning: buffers,Persuasive Claims and Refusals,Chapter,8,Understanding: Demonstrate that you understand the readers goals and needs. Example: We are enclosing a brochure that describes all the Olsen typewriters currently available so that you can more

17、easily find the typewriter with the features you need.,IV. Useful Patterns and Sentences,Beginning: buffers,Persuasive Claims and Refusals,Chapter,8,Resale: Favorably discuss the product or company related to the subject of the letter. Example: With their heavy-duty, full-suspension hardware and fil

18、e cabinets in our Montclair line have become a hit with many value-conscious professionals.,IV. Useful Patterns and Sentences,Beginning: buffers (additional),Persuasive Claims and Refusals,Chapter,8,We understand your concern about the. As always, we are willing to do as much as we reasonably can to

19、 make things right. 我们理解贵方对的关注。我们将一如既往地尽量把事情合情合理地办好。,IV. Useful Patterns and Sentences,Refusal,Persuasive Claims and Refusals,Chapter,8,You were right in assuming that. We are always interested in doing whatever we can to make our sales satisfactory. 贵方认为是对的。我们定会一如既往地尽一切努力使我们的销售令客户满意。,IV. Useful Pat

20、terns and Sentences,Refusal,Persuasive Claims and Refusals,Chapter,8,Your order and request are sincerely appreciated. We are always grateful for the opportunity of serving you in the best way we can. 感谢贵方的订货和要求。能竭诚为贵方服务,我方感激不尽。,IV. Useful Patterns and Sentences,Refusal,Persuasive Claims and Refusal

21、s,Chapter,8,II. Sample Analysis,Letter B: A refusal letter Dear Mr. Kelly: We sincerely appreciate your interest in an account with our company. Whenever we can, we are always willing to serve you. In determining what we can do for you regarding your June 8 request for credit, we made the routine ch

22、ecks you authorized. The information we have received permits us to serve you only as a cash customer. But as you know, cash buying here at our discount prices can make a very real saving for your budget. We hope to see you in the store again very soon, and we look forward to the opportunity of serv

23、ing you. Sincerely, Simon Smith Credit Manager,Persuasive Claims and Refusals,Chapter,8,II. Sample Analysis,1. What is the purpose of this letter? 2. How do the author arrange the body of the letter? 3. How does the author end the letter? 4. Can you sum up the writing principle of refusal letters? K

24、ey: 1. The letter refuses the request. 2. It explains why the request is refused. 3. It ends with words expressing willingness for further business cooperation. 4. The refusal letters do not begin by asking for an adjustment.,Questions for comprehension:,Persuasive Claims and Refusals,Chapter,8,II.

25、Sample Analysis,8. Is the tone of each letter polite and considerate? 9. Does each letter present clearly its explanation? 10. Whats your impression of these letters? Key: 8. Yes, it is polite and considerate. 9. Yes, each letter presents clearly its explanation. 10. Open.,Additional questions for c

26、omprehension:,Persuasive Claims and Refusals,Chapter,8,The best we can do is. 我们最大程度上能做的是。 . permit us to serve you only as a cash customer. 使我们只能按现金客户来为您提供服务。 We feel at this time you will be acting in your own best interest by. 我们认为此时最有利于您的做法是,IV. Useful Patterns and Sentences,Indirect refusal,Per

27、suasive Claims and Refusals,Chapter,8,We must consider the sale final. 我们认为不能退换。 In view of this explanation, you will understand why we must stand by our guarantee policy in this case. 鉴于以上解释,您将会理解为什么在这种情况下我们必须遵守我们的保修政策。,IV. Useful Patterns and Sentences,Indirect refusal,Persuasive Claims and Refus

28、als,Chapter,8,Thank you for this opportunity to explain. We shall continue to work hard to provide you with the service you have a right to expect. 感谢您给我们解释的机会。我们将继续努力工作,为您提供您期望得到的服务。 We hope to see you again in the store, and we look forward to the opportunity of serving you. 希望您再次光临本店, 希望有机会为您服务。,

29、IV. Useful Patterns and Sentences,Ending,Persuasive Claims and Refusals,Chapter,8,We are always pleased to do business with your organization and will continue to serve you with quality industrial equipment. 非常高兴与贵方开展业务合作。我方将继续为贵方提供高质量的工业设备。 So, whenever it is convenient, please come by and let us.

30、因此,敬请在方便的时候光临,我们可以 We wish you the best in enjoying. 希望您尽情享用,IV. Useful Patterns and Sentences,Ending,Persuasive Claims and Refusals,Homework,Ex II on p 121-122 A & B,Chapter,8,Dear Sir/Madam: I am writing to complain about how I was treated when I visited your store a few days ago. When I asked the

31、 salesclerk for help, she ignored me and continued gossiping with a colleague. When I interrupted them they both seemed unhappy and stared at me. When I persisted , one salesclerk offered some assistance very rudely. And when I asked specific questions, she said , “Youll have to be quick. Im due for

32、 my break soon” I have been a customer of this store for 10 years, but it is obvious that your customer service policy leaves a lot to be desired. Otherwise, the salesclerk would not have dared to be so rude. Under such circumstances I shall be taking my business elsewhere in future. Yours faithfull

33、y, Linda Open.,Exercise: improve the letter,Persuasive Claims and Refusals,Chapter,8,II. Sample Analysis,Letter A: A persuasive claim Dear Sir/Madam: SUBJECT: CODE-A-PHONE MODEL 100S Your Code-A-Phone Model 100S answering unit came well recommended. We purchased three for different departments in ou

34、r business. After the three units were unpacked and installed, we discovered a problem. Apparently our office fluorescent lights interfere with the electronics in these units. When the lights are on, heavy static interrupts every telephone call. When the lights are off, the static disappears. We can

35、not replace the fluorescent lights, so we tried to return the Code-A-Phones to the place of purchase (Office Mart, 2560 Haslett Road, Lansing, MI48901). A salesperson inspected the units and said they could not be returned since they were not defective and they had been used. (To be continued),Persu

36、asive Claims and Refusals,Chapter,8,II. Sample Analysis,Letter A: A persuasive claim (Continued) Because the descriptive literature and instructions for the Code-A-Phones say nothing about avoiding use in rooms with fluorescent lights, we expected no trouble. We were quite disappointed that this wel

37、lengineered unitswith the time/date stamp, room monitor and auto-dial featuresfailed to perform as we hoped they would. If you have a model with similar features that would work in our offices, give me a call. Otherwise, please authorize the return of these units and refund the purchase price of $51

38、9.45 (see enclosed invoice). We are confident that a manufacturer with your reputation for excellent products and services will want to resolve this matter quickly. Yours sincerely, Brent W. Barry President,Persuasive Claims and Refusals,Chapter,8,II. Sample Analysis,Letter B: A refusal letter Dear

39、Mr. Kelly: We sincerely appreciate your interest in an account with our company. Whenever we can, we are always willing to serve you. In determining what we can do for you regarding your June 8 request for credit, we made the routine checks you authorized. The information we have received permits us

40、 to serve you only as a cash customer. But as you know, cash buying here at our discount prices can make a very real saving for your budget. We hope to see you in the store again very soon, and we look forward to the opportunity of serving you. Sincerely, Simon Smith Credit Manager,Persuasive Claims

41、 and Refusals,Chapter,8,II. Sample Analysis,1. What is the purpose of each letter? 2. How do the authors arrange the body of the two letters? Key: 1. The first letter aims to tell the reader why the company is responsible and how the writer wants the problem to be solved. The second refuses the requ

42、est. 2. The first letter presents facts to prove the claim is valid. The second explains why the request is refused.,Questions for comprehension:,Persuasive Claims and Refusals,Chapter,8,II. Sample Analysis,3. How do the authors end the two letters? 4. Can you sum up the writing principles of persua

43、sive claims and refusal letters? Key: 3. The first letter is closed by a clear request. The second ends with words expressing willingness for further business cooperation. 4. Both persuasive claims and refusal letters do not begin by asking for an adjustment.,Questions for comprehension:,Persuasive

44、Claims and Refusals,Chapter,8,II. Sample Analysis,5. What kind of order does the persuasive claim letter follow? 6. How does the author of persuasive begin the letter? 7. Does the claim clearly state the problems? Key: 5. It follows the indirect order. 6. The author begins the letter with a complime

45、nt. 7. Yes, it clearly states the problems.,Additional questions for comprehension:,Persuasive Claims and Refusals,Chapter,8,II. Sample Analysis,8. Is the tone of each letter polite and considerate? 9. Does each letter present clearly its explanation? 10. Whats your impression of these letters? Key:

46、 8. Yes, it is polite and considerate. 9. Yes, each letter presents clearly its explanation. 10. Open.,Additional questions for comprehension:,Persuasive Claims and Refusals,Chapter,8,III. Sample Contrast,A refusal of a claim on refund Poor Dear Wanda R. Goldman: We have got your letter and after ca

47、reful investigation, we decided that it is not reasonable for us to reimburse the $1,000 you asked for in your letter. We are sorry that you did not use some of the service we rendered during your recent meeting. But it doesnt mean we didnt provide it. Our brochure doesnt indicate that the exercise

48、room is inside the hotel. You should have noticed when signing the contract. If you have any questions, please dont hesitate to contact me. I am looking forward to your early reply. Yours sincerely, Margret,Persuasive Claims and Refusals,Chapter,8,III. Sample Contrast,A refusal of a claim on refund

49、Improved Dear Wanda R. Goldman: Giving customers a taste of life and emphasizing the well-being of customers is Phoenixs mission of business. We provide resort guests with an exercise room so that our guests can enjoy the aesthetic pleasure and physical fitness while they are here. We are glad that you were satisfied with most of our service and regret to learn that your guests were unable to use the exercise room we offered because of the tight schedule of the meetings and frequent dinner even

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