《2008年高考北京卷作文阅卷分析及不同档次作文展示(高考作文阅卷老师提供).ppt》由会员分享，可在线阅读，更多相关《2008年高考北京卷作文阅卷分析及不同档次作文展示(高考作文阅卷老师提供).ppt（38页珍藏版）》请在三一文库上搜索。
1、2008年高考情景作文 阅卷评分标准,Last week, we hold a class meeting to discuss if we should have a spring outing. Since we have already in grade three, all of us agreed that we need one to relax ourselves. Then, we talked excitingly about where we would go. Somebody said hed like to an amusement part, some people
2、 preferred paddling on a lack, and I suggested to climb a hill and have a picnic. Finally, I convinced the others. On a sunny day, we set out to Xiang Shan Park. There are colourful flowers, soft green grass all along the road to the top of the hill. So we had a really wonderful walking experience.
3、But once we reach the top we were shocked by the terrible environment. Plastic bags, bottles, papers and other things spreaded everywhere! That time we had no excitement but angry and disappointment in heart. So we decide to clean up the whole hill. We picked up every litter and separated them in “c
4、an recycle” and “cant recycle”. Then, we threw them into particular bin. Although we didnt have a picnic as we wish. But we had a quiet meaningful day!,But once we reach the top we were shocked by the terrible environment. Plastic bags, bottles, papers and other things spreaded everywhere! That time
5、 we had no excitement but angry and disappointment in heart. So we decide to clean up the whole hill. We picked up every litter and separated them in “can recycle” and “cant recycle”. Then, we threw them into particular bin. Although we didnt have a picnic as we wish. But we had a quiet meaningful d
6、ay!,内容要点齐全，细节描述连贯流畅，但有较明显的语法和用词错误。,14,Greatly comes the spring. As the wind softly blows, it brings back the vitality to the great outdoor. Students in our class were excited, too, and eager to have a spring outing in the weekend last week. A heated discussion was held. Some students suggested we go
7、 boating, some insisted that going hiking was the best idea, while some thought the amusement park was of more fun.,Finally, we decided to go hiking in the mountains on a sunny day. The flowers were blooming happily and sout their welcome to us. With excitement in our heart, we climbed the mountain
8、easily and reached the peak soon. To our surprise, wheat we found on the peak was not only beautiful scenery, but also rubbish here and there. Feeling so bad for the environment spoilt, we changed our plan and began picking up the rubbish. Afterward, we brought the rubbish down the mountain and sort
9、ed them into “can be recycled” and “cant be recycled”. We finally dropped them into different bins set at the foot of the mountain. Fun as we had during the trip, we still felt so sorry for the ruined nature. I think it is everyones duty to take cared of the environment so that we can contribute to
10、a better loving and relaxing space for others.,Fun as we had during the trip, we still felt so sorry for the ruined nature. I think it is everyones duty to take cared of the environment so that we can contribute to a better loving and relaxing space for others.,内容要点齐全，连贯，恰当地使用了连接成份，所用句式和词汇较丰富，体现了较强地
11、语言运用能力。,18,Last week, there was a heated discussion on where to go for Spring Outing. Some students wanted to go amusement park, some considered to go boating and others gave their ideas for climbing. Eventually, we decided to take a climb. The next day, all of us prepared well, with our enjoyment,
12、each of us climbed the mountain full of energy. However, when we got to the top of the mountain, what covered our eyes first was the mass of rubbish. It was really a pity that the rubbish destroyed a beautiful scenery. At last we made up our mind to pick up the rubbish.,After a while, with everyones
13、 effort, the rubbish was cleared off immediately and we put them into the recycle and unrecle bins. In my eyes this spring outing not only gave us lots of pleasure, but also gave us a meaningful lesson. Only to protect our environment can we get a beautiful society. Therefore, I hope everyone can jo
14、in us to make our home clean and tidy.,覆盖了所有的内容要点，语法和用词能满足任务要求。篇章较为连贯，有少许语言错误。,16,阅卷的标准和原则 情景作文阅卷原则以内容定档次，以语言质量给分数。 1. 内容要点要齐全，细节缺失一个直接进入三档文（12-14）之间，但如果语言很好也可以由14分加到15分，相反，时态混乱，语言不美，错误太多，或语言不准确，就在原档的基础上扣1分，如二档的下线15-1=14。少两个细节直接进入三档下线12分，然后在视其语言给分,2. 如果对投放垃圾桶的描述为Proper bins 被视为缺少细节信息，应写出可回收和不可回收。如第一
15、幅图没有写出讨论的结果，如：All the students agreed at last ; we all wanted to go immediately. 被视为缺少细节信息。,3. 漏掉一个要点直接进4档11分，如果语言好也可以由11变成12分；错误信息也被视为缺少要点，如：第1 幅图说成三个地方都去，则直接进入11分线。,4. 文章要有明确的结尾。此文不能只写到 扔了垃圾就结束了，如果没有结尾就扣 1分。最简单的结尾可以是，finally, we went back home , we were tired but happy . 5. 没按顺序写的、人称没用we 的直接进四档（6-
16、11）。 6. 1、4图的细节考虑的范围比较窄，2、3图的细节考虑得比较宽泛。,7. 一定要通过上下文和前后局来看学生的文章是否表达出要说的内容，不必死扣某个词或某个句子，如：discuss, climb the mountain等，忌讳以单词来评判学生的文章，要通篇看而非只言片语或支离破碎。要强调前后文的连贯性，如：在第1图中写过We decided to climb the mountain , 到第2图时他直接写We started .就可以。,8. 不要替考生解读文章，他没说清楚就不要替他理解。如：I was a sunny day . 则视为错误。 9. 开头不必自我介绍自报家门，应
17、该描述一个过去的事情。人称必须用we，写的是稿件而不是信件，所以不应写Dear editor, I want to tell you 结尾也不要署名字. 此文描写的是上周的事，时态必须是过去时。,10. 每幅图都要既有要点又有细节。内容要生动具体，语言要连贯优美。,Main points and details,假设你是红星中学高三一班的学生李华，为校刊英语园地写一篇题为“Our Spring Outing” 的英文稿件。 请根据以下四幅图的先后顺序，叙述上周你们班从准备春游到春游结束的完整过程。,图1：要点是要讨论去哪里，细节是三个选项及结果。三个地点都要说还有final decision
18、。,1. Last Thursday, we had a class meeting to discuss where to go for our spring outing. 2. We came up with several choices such as going boating, climbing a mountain, and going to an amusement park. 3 Finally, we decided to go mountain climbing.,图2：要点是第二天爬山。细节是具体爬山的过程，可以写风景，写太阳，写花草树木，或是爬山时的心情，或爬山前作
19、了充分的准备工作，还可以是一个一个地往上爬，也可以是进行爬山比赛。还可以写上It was a sunny day . 这些情况之一都可以认为有细节。如没有，则视为细节缺失。,1. The next day, we set off early in the morning. 2. While climbing the mountain, we enjoyed the warm sunshine and a beautiful view.,图3：要点是捡垃圾。细节是到了山顶或山中的一平地，垃圾可以是别人留下的也可以是这些人自己留下的然后决定去捡去收拾。如：We were surprised to
20、see lots of (all kinds of ) rubbish, 也可以说出垃圾的名称，重点要写到“把垃圾捡起来”.,1. However, when we reached the top, 2. we were shocked to see litter here and there, such as bottles and banana peels. 3. Then we started to pick up the litter.,图4：要点是春游结束了，学生投放垃圾。细节是把垃圾分类投放，放到可回收利用的和不可回收利用的垃圾桶，如果写不出recycling ,non-recyc
21、ling 也应该写出we put rubbish into different bins and some can be used again .,Afterwards, we put the rubbish into the nearby recycling bin and non-recycling bin respectively（各自地，分别地 ）.,文章要有明确的结尾。此文不能只写到扔了垃圾就结束了，如果没有结尾就扣1分。最简单的结尾可以是，Finally, we went back home , we were tired but happy .,We were tired but
22、 happy, because.,How to link the pictures to make a complete and logical story,Link pictures by logic :,decide to,To our surprise,After that,result,Contrast to our good mood,result,Link pictures by time order :,Early the next morning,However,Later/before we leave,A meaningful ending:,We were tired b
23、ut happy, because what we did was quite meaningful.,假设你是红星中学高三一班的学生李华，为校刊英语园地写一篇题为“Our Spring Outing” 的英文稿件。 请根据以下四幅图的先后顺序，叙述上周你们班从准备春游到春游结束的完整过程。,游乐园 amusement park 垃圾箱 Recycle bin Non-recycle bin To our surprise, Excited and interested, We were tired but happy.,Last Thursday, we had a class meetin
24、g to discuss where to go for our spring outing. We came up with several choices such as going boating, climbing a mountain, and going to an amusement park. Finally, we decided to go mountain climbing. The next day, we set off early in the morning. While climbing the mountain, we enjoyed the warm sun
25、shine and a beautiful view. However, when reached the top, we were shocked to see litter here and there, such as bottles and banana peels. Then we started to pick up the litter. Afterwards, we put the rubbish into the nearby recycling bin and non-recycling bin respectively. We were tired but happy.,