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1、Unit Nineteen Accepting and Declining Etiquette接受与婉谢礼仪,Focal Points,1. How to respond to an invitation properly,2. How to decline an invitation properly,3. How to accept or decline a job offer,Contents,Lead in,1,Reading A,2,Reading B,3,Reading C,4,5,Exercises,How would you answer the following quest
2、ions politely?,Warming-up,Yes, please./Sure. Thanks,No, thank you./No, but thanks for offering.,Okay. Sounds good./Sure. Id love to.,Im sorry, but I cant./No, but thanks for inviting me.,All right. Thanks/Looks good. Thanks.,No, thanks./Im really full. Thanks anyway.,Great. What time?/All right. Whe
3、n and where?,Sorry. I dont think I can./How about some other time?,RSVP,RSVP stands for the French phrase “rpondez sil vous plat” and in colloquial English means “please reply.” It is used when someone issues you a social invitation and wants to know - and soon - whether you intend to come or not. H
4、eres how to give the inviter the proper courtesy when asked to RSVP. Steps 1. Check your calendar. See if you are free on the appointed date and time. If you previously accepted another invitation for that time, you will have to decline the new one. 2. Make up your mind by the date specified on the
5、invitation; if a “reply by” date was not listed, reply within 24 hours of receiving the invitation. What if,Reading A,Unit Nineteen Accepting and Declining Etiquette,RSVP,something better comes up later? That doesnt matter. Maybe it will, maybe it wont, but it is rude not to reply quickly to any inv
6、itation and show up as promised. 3. Dont leave your potential hosts in suspense. If you want to hold your schedule open, the proper response to an invitation is, “Thank you for the invitation, but Im afraid I will not be able to attend” - saying, “No thanks,” instead of, “Please wait until I see wha
7、t else comes along.” True, you might not get a better offer after all, and if you turn down the invitation, you could end up having nothing else to do that night, but you are abusing the graciousness of your hosts if you keep them on the string as your back-up plan.,Reading A,Unit Nineteen Accepting
8、 and Declining Etiquette,RSVP,4. Reply in writing or in kind. To be most proper, one would reply in writing, by hand. But one may reply in the same format that one was invited; for example, an email invitation can be answered by email. 5. Communicate last-minute changes. What if the time comes and y
9、ou cant attend after all? Maybe youre not feeling well, or your cat broke its leg, or there was some real emergency. Then, as soon as you know, you must get in touch with the host (by telephone is fine) to let them know you cant come, and apologize. Acceptance of a social invitation did not constitu
10、te a legal obligation; your RSVP just communicated your best intentions.,Reading A,Unit Nineteen Accepting and Declining Etiquette,RSVP,Tips No reply card: Because exasperated hosts were making a lot of follow-up phone calls to inconsiderate invitees, the “reply card” was invented and is often consi
11、dered standard and even necessary. However, if a reply card is not included with a formal invitation, you still need to reply in writing and provide the stamp. Schedule uncertainty: If you have other plans brewing but not finalized, you can phone the hosts and say, “I may be in Mexico at that time,
12、but Ill know by the 20th. Would that be enough time to let you know?” They may have to say no (if they need a head count for the caterer by the 15th, for example) but they will probably say yes. Write a note on your calendar to RSVP by the date you said you would.,Reading A,Unit Nineteen Accepting a
13、nd Declining Etiquette,RSVP,Bringing other guests: If you want to bring extra people, re-read the invitation. It may allow for your guests, in which case you can respond for your party. “Hi, Jane, yes, I would like to come, and my sister is also available; thanks for thinking of us.” If not, you can
14、 call the hosts and ask for clarification. If the invitation says “and Guest” or “And Family”, yes you are invited to bring a date or the kids. If it is just to you, this means just you. Invitations from businesses and non-profits: If you are a major donor to a charity and they ask for an RSVP to a
15、fancy sit-down banquet, do reply if you expect to attend, and dont show up unannounced if you didnt reply. If an invitation doesnt say RSVP: If you receive a social invitation that does not indicate to RSVP, you should still reply. It is polite to accept or decline all invitations.,Reading A,Unit Ni
16、neteen Accepting and Declining Etiquette,How to Decline an Invitation to Dinner or Other Social Events,Have you ever been invited to a dinner you did not want to attend? Or perhaps a friend invites you to a social function that you would rather avoid? If you have experienced any of these social situ
17、ations, you may know how difficult it is to decline the offer. Accepting an invitation is a good way to get out of your comfort zone and develop relationships, but sometimes turning down the offer is the only realistic solution for those with a busy schedule or personal reasons. 1. Understand why yo
18、u were invited. Is your friend inviting you? Do you work in a small company, and your boss is inviting you to dinner? Are you expected to attend this invitation? What would the consequences be if you didnt attend?,Reading B,Unit Nineteen Accepting and Declining Etiquette,How to Decline an Invitation
19、 to Dinner or Other Social Events,2. Weigh the importance of this invitation. There are many social obligations we face throughout life, some more important than others. A social event that typically occurs once in a lifetime, such as a “coming of age” party or someones wedding, should have more imp
20、ortance over a night at the movies. How does this invitation rate compared with your existing obligations and priorities? 3. Thank the person. Someone is taking their time to invite you to some event they feel is worthwhile. Thank the person for their consideration. 4. Create a delay if needed. If y
21、oure confronted in person with a verbal invitation, respond with a request to check your schedule. This may be communicated within a question, as in “do you mind if I check my schedule and get back to you?”, or a statement, “I really need to check my schedule before I commit to anything”.,Reading B,
22、Unit Nineteen Accepting and Declining Etiquette,How to Decline an Invitation to Dinner or Other Social Events,5. Be honest. To an extent, truthfully give the person a yes or no response. Sometimes a direct answer is desired, especially if the invitation is a social event with an RSVP. Many invitatio
23、ns will have a form on the card to select either yes or no. In this situation, it is not necessary to give an elaborated response. If youre unable or unwilling to attend, simply mark no and thank the sender for his or her invitation. 6. Follow up with a positive conclusion. If applicable, let the pe
24、rson know you are interested in accepting the social event at a different time or under different circumstances. Showing interest softens the rejection of an offer.,Reading B,Unit Nineteen Accepting and Declining Etiquette,How to Decline an Invitation to Dinner or Other Social Events,7. Accept the f
25、irst invitation or dont accept any if you received more than one for a particular night that would overlap or conflict. 8. Make an excuse. If things are going really badly, just say, “Im really sorry but,” and say something realistic and important and if they say ok, then just dont answer any calls
26、at the time and stay away. Tips Invitations are given for a variety of reasons, but many are positive. Whether given to a friend, family member, co-worker, or acquaintance, it is most likely given because the person cares about you. Remember this when declining an invitation.,Reading B,Unit Nineteen
27、 Accepting and Declining Etiquette,How to Decline an Invitation to Dinner or Other Social Events,If you are really not interested in a social event because it is not your cup of tea, tell them. Regardless of any events popularity, no one should expect people to have the same joys in life. If you rec
28、eive multiple invitations for the same night, you should always accept the first one you received. If you decline the other invitations you can let them know you have a prior commitment. Never decline an invitation to one party to attend another one that you were invited to later. You will appear as
29、 if you waited for the better offer.,Reading B,Unit Nineteen Accepting and Declining Etiquette,Accepting and Declining a Job Offer,How to Accept an Offer Irrespective of how an offer is communicated to you (by phone, email, or standard mail), you should contact the employer by phone as soon as possi
30、ble to acknowledge receipt of the offer. Even if you are not ready to accept the offer initially, you shouldnt wait more than 24 hours to let the employer know that you have received the offer and are seriously contemplating it. When you call to acknowledge, give the employer an estimate of when you
31、 will be able to make a final decision. While you shouldnt box yourself into an unrealistic deadline, dont leave the employer up in the air for fear you will seem unenthusiastic or indecisive.,Reading C,Unit Nineteen Accepting and Declining Etiquette,Accepting and Declining a Job Offer,If, on receip
32、t of the offer, you know that you want to take the job, a telephonic response is also the best avenue of communication. Place your call to the attorney in charge of hiring or the person who communicated the offer to you. If you cannot reach him/her and get voicemail or an assistant, ask that he/she
33、call you back. A typical message might be the following: “This is Jane Doe, a student at Law School. I am very excited to have received an offer from your office and hope you will be able to call me back shortly to discuss it further. I can be reached at (607) 123-4567.”,Reading C,Unit Nineteen Acce
34、pting and Declining Etiquette,Accepting and Declining a Job Offer,By making sure you speak directly with a decision maker, you can avoid miscommunications which can lead to problems. If you are unable to speak directly with someone after trying to reach them by phone, it is appropriate to do one of
35、two things: leave your acceptance in a voice message or accept by email. Neither of these are 100% foolproof, as messages and emails can be lost. So you may want to ask the recipient to confirm receipt of the message with a quick call or email in return. How to Decline an Offer It is important to de
36、cline offers as promptly as possible, so that your fellow students may benefit from the “rolling offers.” This should be done tactfully, both for your own sake and for the reputation of your school. Your letter should,Reading C,Unit Nineteen Accepting and Declining Etiquette,Accepting and Declining
37、a Job Offer,express your appreciation of the offer and your high regard for the employer, indicating that it was difficult to make the final decision. Do not burn any bridges. You may want to reapply to this employer sometime in the future. Sample Letter It is with great regret that I write you this
38、 letter to inform you that I will not be able to accept your offer of employment for the upcoming summer. I have been fortunate in receiving a number of offers and only after considerable thought and soul searching have I been able to make a decision on which offer to accept. I assure you that I hav
39、e the highest opinion of (your organization), and I look forward to practicing in Hartford this summer and hope to see you then.,Reading C,Unit Nineteen Accepting and Declining Etiquette,RSVP RSVP is an abbreviation for “rpondez sil vous plat,“ which means “please reply.“ It is written on the bottom
40、 of a card inviting you to a party or special occasion. 敬请赐复 例：Take note of the RSVP date at the bottom of any invitation as it is good manners to reply early. 记下每一份邀请函底部的回复日期，因为早点儿回复是有礼貌的做法。,Words & Expressions,colloquial ADJ Colloquial words and phrases are informal and are used mainly in conversa
41、tion. 口语的 例：Listen again and match the words with the colloquial expressions. 再听一次，对应词语和口头表达。,Words & Expressions,decline V-T/V-I If you decline something or decline to do something, you politely refuse to accept it or do it. 谢绝 例：He offered the boys some coffee. They declined politely. 他要给男孩们来些咖啡。他
42、们礼貌地拒绝了。,Words & Expressions,potential ADJ You use potential to say that someone or something is capable of developing into the particular kind of person or thing mentioned. 潜在的 例：The company has identified 60 potential customers. 该公司已确定了60位潜在的客户。,Words & Expressions,suspense N-UNCOUNT Suspense is a
43、 state of excitement or anxiety about something that is going to happen very soon, for example about some news that you are waiting to hear. 悬念 例：I dont think much about TV serial because they always keep you in suspense. 我觉得电视连续剧并不怎么样，因为它们总是吊你的胃口。,Words & Expressions,graciousness n. 亲切，和蔼；好心 例：Desp
44、ite his achievements, he retains an endearing sense of graciousness and humility. 尽管有那么多成就，库珀还是保持着和蔼谦逊的亲切感。,Words & Expressions,back-up n. 备份 adj. 作支援的 vt. 为做备份 例：Not many people have given up on financial services entirely, but many more people are developing back-up plans. 完全放弃金融服务业的人不是很多，但更多的人都在准
45、备备用计划。,Words & Expressions,format N-COUNT The format of a piece of computer software, a movie or a musical recording is the type of equipment on which it is designed to be used or played. For example, possible formats for a movie are DVD and video cassette. (计算机软件、电影、音乐录制品等的) 格式 例：His latest album i
46、s available on all formats. 他的最新专辑有各种格式可以买到。,Words & Expressions,emergency N-COUNT An emergency is an unexpected and difficult or dangerous situation, especially an accident, that happens suddenly and that requires quick action to deal with it. 突发事件; 紧急情况 例：He deals with emergencies promptly. 他迅速地应对
47、突发事件。,Words & Expressions,obligation N-VAR If you have an obligation to a person, it is your duty to take care of them or protect their interests. 义务; 责任 例：The United States will do that which is necessary to meet its obligations to its own citizens. 美国会尽其对国民应尽的义务。,Words & Expressions,exasperated V-
48、T If someone or something exasperates you, they annoy you and make you feel frustrated or upset. 触怒; 激怒 例：The sheer futility of it all exasperates her. 它的完全无效使她很恼火。,Words & Expressions,inconsiderate ADJ If you accuse someone of being inconsiderate, you mean that they do not take enough care over how
49、 their words or actions will affect other people. 不体谅人的 例：Its a bit inconsiderate of her not to let you know when she expects to arrive. 她不让你知道她什么时候会到，这样做有些不体谅人。,Words & Expressions,uncertainty N-VAR Uncertainty is a state of doubt about the future or about what is the right thing to do. 不确定状态 例：And uncertainty affects behavior, which feeds the crisis. 不确定性影响着孕育危机的行为。,Words & Expressions,caterer N-COUNT Caterers are people or companies that provide food and drink for a place such as an office or for special occasions such